My recent Op-Ed piece titled "Precious and a Princess" kicked up a firestorm.
Some readers were offended because I compared the lives of some Black women to that of Claireese "Precious" Jones's life in Lee Daniel's film Precious -- even though many Black girls live under the burdens of poverty, domestic violence, molestation and, yes, HIV infection.
One reader was upset that I talked about teaching our daughters how to use condoms rather than just encouraging abstinence. I agree we should encourage our daughters to abstain from sex until they are in healthy stable relationships. But there is a large (and growing) body of research showing that teaching our children only abstinence instead of comprehensive sex education that includes abstinence as well as clear safer sex guidelines just leaves them in greater danger of having unprotected sex, putting them at higher risk for HIV and other sexually-transmitted diseases. HIV/AIDS is a deadly disease. We have a responsibility to ensure our children have every possible weapon to protect them from infection.
Another reader attributed Black women's struggles to their embrace of feminism, rather than structural issues like racism, failing public school systems and the declining availability of urban manufacturing jobs for high-school-educated men. I vehemently disagree. Returning women to the back of the gender bus will only rob them of the power to control their own destinies.
But the most provocative comment came from a man who chastised me for focusing on the plight of Black girls and women because Black men are in far worse shape than Black women. And by almost every measure, he's right. But this is not an either/or proposition. Black women faring badly, but better than Black men, are not mutually exclusive facts. Raising Black women up does not mean pushing Black men down. Suggesting we take better care of our daughters does not exclude the need to take better care of our sons.
Having said that, I want to say some things about the condition of Black boys and young men. Recent data show white men facing an unemployment rate of just over 10% compared with over 18% among Black men. Among young Black men without a high-school diploma, the data are catastrophic; nearly half have no jobs or even prospects for employment. These rates are based on a labor-force number which excludes those in prison; given that there are five times as many Blacks behind bars as whites, including the incarcerated would make the terrible unemployment gap even worse. Black boys/young men are 40% of the male US prison population, but represent only 13% of the male population in the U.S.
If research shows that half of Black girls ages 14 to 19 have an STD, the rate must be also be high among our boys. In 2006, Black teens ages 13-19 accounted for 69 percent of new AIDS cases among teens. Research also shows that the HIV rate among urban gay and bisexual Black men under 30 is in the range of 50 percent.
Recently the Kaiser Family Foundation and the Black AIDS Institute conducted focus groups on attitudes about HIV/AIDS in Black communities. One of the panels involved only Black men. In addition to asking their perspectives on a host of AIDS-related issues, we inquired about the state of their lives. Some of the answers we heard were sobering.
We learned, for example, that young Black men don't just feel isolated from white America -- in fact, many of them have written white America off and have long given up on being accepted by the larger society. The shocker is they feel isolated from Black adults, leaders and institutions, from the community that they would traditionally turn to when mainstream society rejected them. Many young Black men believe that Black America has rolled them under the bus -- that the oppression they face is not only coming from white people. White women, they say, aren't the only ones clutching their purses and crossing to the other side of the street when they seem them coming; They feel traditional Black Institutions have abandoned them.
The truth of the matter is, a lot of Black adults think of young Black men only as a problem, not part of the solution. As alienated and disillusioned as they might be, young Black men want to participate in our community. We are only fooling ourselves if we think that our community can improve itself while leaving Black boys and young men behind. Just as elevating Black women makes our entire community better, so investing in Black men is good for us as well. As Martin Luther King admonished us forty three years ago, "We are bound together in a single garment of destiny". We need to do both.
Phill Wilson is the founder and CEO of the Black AIDS Institute (www.BlackAIDS.org). He can be reached at PhillWilson@BlackAIDS.org
Comments: (21)
Add a comment
By: mopedhat on 1/10/2010 5:07PM
So young Black men don't just feel isolated from white America in fact, many of them have written white America off and have long given up on being accepted by the larger society. That’s a lie. You would never think that was an issue in my town where you see more black males and white women as couples. They boldly and proudly walk the streets with their women and don’t seem worried that they are not accepted by white society. They appear to be happy and content and in some cases like they have won the lottery with their woman. No greater freedom than to be able to do something that not so long ago just a glance at a white woman got black men lynched or burned alive. I will never understand how black males see carrying a book or God forbid caught reading a book as acting white but not being with white women. They find every excuse to be uneducated and dumb.
Young black males are feared by adults because they have proven they have no respect for black life and are willing to kill them without remorse. The communities are under siege by the scum and thugs who have successfully used the deadly phenomenon of no snitching. They use it to get away with crimes against other blacks without paying the price for their acts of violence and criminality. Adult women and girls live in fear of being molested on the streets or dragged off and gang raped by males hanging out on the streets. Most adult black men are panty wasted cowards with no back bone to stand up to the thugs and scum bags the way real brave black men did during the civil rights movement. They stood up to the KKK with little more than their bravery to be treated as men. All of a sudden they are scared to be men and stand up to their own children. Afraid to stop the chaos by any means necessary like was told to the KKK.Yet the first to yell and fist wave when cops come in and be the man and slap them around and worst.
Young black males are sold a bill of goods through rap and street culture. They choose to follow leaders and institutions that spew nothing but hatred for the white man and misogynist BS. They are used as sucker bait to fill the false leaders cash buckets. So called militant leaders are the biggest drug dealers and pimps in the communities and have made the communities drug addicted slums and killing fields that young black males fall prey too. Must see "American Gangster Series" shows how those hypocrites destroyed black communities with drugs, violence and murdering whole families including black babies. They created the problems and destruction with their sinister actions. They created all the problems in the black communities. They think all blacks are stupid with their it was the FBI who is at fault for all the chaos.Its young black males who sell poison to their people on their streets and shoot down and killed other blacks like dogs.
The communities that they would traditionally have turn to,the black drug lords destroyed and decent law abiding blacks that could afford to leave for safer surroundings left. The others who can’t leave live in fear of them. Many young Black men who believe that Black America has rolled them under the bus have rolled themselves under the bus by living the rap culture and think being a homo erotic gun toting drop pants thug is real black manhood. They are dumb lazy no talking idiots. The oppression they say they face from white’s is coming equally from from black men who fuel them with drugs, guns,violence and death.
So far as the traditional Black Institutions are concern, they are turning into places to hang out at and some of the black colleges had gotten so ghetto a mandatory dress code was enforced. Many will unfortunately be closed down. I’m sick of the whining from black males when they don’t seem to get it that they must make the difference in their lives as men and build up the race instead of always trying to find a way to escape from reality and the responsibilities of black family manhood. It must start with at least getting a basic education.
Reply to this Comment | Report This
By: Gence on 1/16/2010 9:33PM
By me reading this ,you are a female ,now how can you say that about black men not all black men are like some of the ones you are talking about ,I am trying to raise my son up to respect all women white or black an that story that a blackman need to be in a black boy life is not true ,my mother was both it just take a strong parent to raise a child today we as a whole lost out you an me an others living like the white people you are talking about an the ones that couldn't come up now people like you want to judge or show negtive signs of young black men an as that movie ,its just that a movie thats all ,some people !
Report This
By: Mike on 1/10/2010 11:09PM
Straight up insanity. What a bunch of garbage you just posted. You're a liar.
Report This
By: Tiffany on 1/12/2010 10:55AM
Totally agree. Keep talking.
Report This
By: TYRONE on 1/12/2010 12:10PM
WOW, WELL SAID!
Report This
By: KD on 1/12/2010 2:42PM
Overall, i like what u saying...ESPECIALLY the last part!
Report This
By: dre on 1/12/2010 3:26PM
While I can agree in spirit with some of that you have posted, it sent warnings throughout my black spine. I recently pulled my son out of a college close to one you speak of. I know first hand some of the business that went on there. I will not allow my son to be psychosocially castrated by the spirit of "separate and unequal" that is so pervasive in that complex. The college dorm was basically a sexpit and he, at his young age was left to fend for himself academically. I would love to hear though more about your recruitment efforts of men who know how to navigate the tough waters of black maleness. Children, those young black men, essentially have untrained minds. Their minds need to be positively cultivated by learned men such as yourself, assuming that you are a sideline observing African American male. I am hopefully assuming also that there is action behind your words and you aren't merely vomiting angry rhetoric at our young black men. The media is rife with opinionated arm-chair villians who spew their venomous hatred at our young black men. These same individuals however are mere spineless creatures who would rather preach than teach. Lets get into the trenches together - our boys are a tough lot, but are receptive and eager to learn the right way from us. Take it from the father of a young black man who loves rap, loves to drive fast, hates snitches, respects all, plays video games, likes to sag his pants, is respectful, but who also listens and understands his responsibility to himself, his race and his future.
Report This
By: rasfanta on 1/10/2010 5:25PM
Precious boys/girls; men/women can be found amongst every race of people. The root cause of Precioius people need to be explored and not exploited for entertainment purposes.
Reply to this Comment | Report This
By: Mike on 1/10/2010 7:37PM
Thanks for speaking up for black males too cause too many of you are suckas for the divide-and-conquer game of discussing lifting black women and the mention of the black male never occurs. Ask Oprah with her African school and the myriad of black feminists who evidently have no love for black males. I pity their sons if no dad is around. The stats show clearly what's happening to this helpless boys 0 - 12 in these female headed households.
Ladies, I'm being respectful and trying to be clear. But those stats for black males are totally unacceptable to me & there's no man around. I see too many of you black women berating black men on these sites but it never occurs to you that their mothers never did their motherly duty to connect those sons to their bio dads.
Evidence is clear you're misleading your sons and I even think I know why. You're not calling me out for a fight are you? Then do right by those boys.
Reply to this Comment | Report This
By: dre on 1/12/2010 3:38PM
I agree but only with what I interpret as a veiled call to us as black men. Honestly, I don't read you speaking to the Oprah's and other women who boldly speak up for women and girls. I hear you pleading to other men like yourself to step up. Just as blacks generally speak up for blacks, women speak up for women. Men need to support male causes. The call then is for the rest of the internet community of black men and black men in general to speak and support black males. In the end, we will have not only avoided a confrontation with black women who are attempting to raise black women and girls, but we will together raise awareness of black men and women. The bonds will certainly be strengthened and a race will be uplifted. I'll blog with you anytime bruh.
Report This