Bush Making Big Return To White House
Annette Insdorf: The Central Park Five Premieres in Cannes
Well, I'm here to confess my Internal Blackness Violations (IBVs). I'm finally going to get it all off my chest. These are things I often think, but dare not say. Until now.
And while many of my most secret thoughts may undermine my legitimacy as a black woman, I must let them out before I explode. I warn you. It's not pretty.
1. I think Michelle Obama is kinda funny looking.
2. I could care less about that hoopla over Reggie Bush being on the cover of Essence and even less about who he dates.
3. I think the WNBA is full of ugly lesbians (not that anything's wrong with that).
4. I think Michael Steele is embarrassingly inarticulate.
5. I think many of Tom Joyner's "Little-Known Black History Facts" are, in fact, not true.
6. Women sportscasters, police officers and soldiers make me uncomfortable. Pam Oliver not withstanding, I just haven't gotten comfortable with women in those positions yet. I want a man to show up to my 911 call. Sorry Gloria Steinem.
7. I think Kwanzaa is stupid. (And too damn complicated)
8. Sometimes I say in my head, 'I'm glad my hair isn't as nappy as hers.'
9. I think David Brooks is right more than he is wrong.
10. I think Tyra was getting too big.
11. (As a single black woman) I'm sick of hearing black women complain about being single. Read a book.
12. I think Michael Baisden is silly, loud and annoying, and that most of the people that call his show are morons.
13. The bitter black women wing of the blogosphere is so tired. They all just need to get laid. Outrage-obsessed black women are sooooo 20th century.
14. I've never liked Teena Marie's voice. I think she sounds terrible.
15. Whenever they start to play reggae music at a party, I go sit down.
16. I secretly think all Nigerians are gonna rip me off. Sorry.
17. I haven't bought a Mary J. Blige album since "What's the 411."
Whew! The first step is admitting the problem and being honest with yourself. Okay, now I can sleep tonight.
Do you have any IBVs?
Peace, people.
Comments: (207)
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By: lane ward on 2/04/2010 8:52AM
Please people just give the fact that you are BLACK a rest, there is really no need to discuss this ALL the time... it is soooo tired !
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By: dark matter on 2/06/2010 9:48PM
I'm not sure which is funnier...Jam's article or the commentary that follows. I'm gonna go with the commentary:
Here's my 2 cents:
1. Folks who assume that if you make a negative comment about "us" you must be white. Common Man.
2. Black folks taking up transfer taxes (read welfare) who think they are entitled and teach their children they are entitled
3. Alums from HBCU's who think they sh!t don't stink...lb for lb you generally falling short
To the brotha that said "pot calling the kettle black"...uh, check out Feb ebony page 26...Jam is one sexy MF (uh, Jam, feel free to look me up anytime;-)
Holla!
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By: Tela on 2/08/2010 6:53AM
I want to thank Jam for posting this blog. Everybody has their own opinions, and she didn't say anything that some of us haven't said ourselves, maybe not out loud but we have thought it and probably discussed it among friends. For people to get upset about this blog is crazy. She posted it to start a dialogue and it certainly accomplished that task. People have stated that they didn't like it, they thought it was racist, they won't be reading it anymore - and that is certainly their choice, but it did get them talking.
I have to agree with Shelly when she said Mo'Nique is way to loud. I caught a little bit of her show and she needs to bring it down a few notches. I really used to like Mo'Nique because I thought she was funny, but I stopped watching her after I seen the Parkers. I do not like to see a woman act desperate; chasing after a man that doesn't want you is not cute or funny.
Applauding people who go to prison, but not to college is insane. I think our children should not be looking up to some of these ball players who don't have an education. Sure they are getting a lot of money, but realistically every kid is not going to become a NBA/NFL player or a rapper. Let's teach the children to focus on getting a good education and a promising career.
Like Beezeeles I really dislike Tyler Perry movies. His movies all seem to have the same theme. I do not have a transvestite, loud mouth 'big mama'. Not all Black people have one. Also, I'm sick of seeing Black women be abused. White people abuse their wives and girlfriends and they even kill them. I do not watch House of payne or meet the browns because it is nothing but coonery and buffoonery. TP make a movie with some substance.
A couple of people mentioned Obama. We need to stop acting like he is the messiah. The bush administration screwed this country up for eight long years, there is no way Obama can fix it overnight. I believe they put him in there to fail and if we want to see change we need to start doing our part instead of saying he didn't do what he said he was going to do. He's doing the best he can and we have to stick with it. Obama needs to get tough and put his foot down just like bush was vetoing every thing he wanted pushed through.
As a few of you stated I too am sick of BW whining about not having a man, or accepting any man just to have somebody in their bed. Like Beezeeles said "stop waiting for a ring", go out there and accomplish things on your own. You don't need a man to define who you are. Shoot, buy your own darn ring - I did. No,I am not some hard up, ugly woman. I am a young, beautiful Black, hard working lady and I am now working on getting my doctorate degree.
My IBV's
1. I'm sick of seeing that no talent B. Knowles. They are trying to force feed her to us and she is not the epitome of a black woman.
2. BET is run by white people, the original founders sold it long ago. I'm sick of the stupid crap they show and try to pass it off as black entertainment television.
3. I hate reality t.v. I was doing homework the other night and happen to catch that show "all about Pep" or whatever the heck the name was. It was so degrading. She's a 40 something year old woman acting like a sex straved tramp. I know she has bills to pay like everybody else but why would a person do a show like that? Is that what little Black girls should aspire to? Let's show some positive Black women.
4. I'm sick of Black men putting down Black women, talking about we are ignorant, gold digging sluts. If you guys really wanted a real Black woman you would look for a woman with something to offer in other areas than the bed.
5. I'm sick of these BM that are celebrities getting with these white women and then when they are taking to the cleaners or they get busted doing wrong they want to look to the Black women to support them. Have you learned anything from O.J?
6. I'm sick of seeing some of these BW who have children with their hair and nails hooked up and their kids in clothes two sizes to small and looking like they haven't seen soap and water in months.
7. BM and BW teach your children some morals. Teach them to be respectful and instill in them the value of getting a good education.
8. BW stop putting those heavy ass weaves in your little girls hair. Teach them that they are beautiful and they don't need hair down to their behinds to make them that way. And, dress them like they are little girls not hookers in training.
9. Black people we need to learn how to stick together. Every other race sticks together and they are getting ahead, we are killing each other off and stealing from our sisters and brothers instead of making our communities strong. Each one teach one and we can build a better tomorrow.
10. I like rap/hip hop and R&B, but lets stop supporting these artists that promote these misogynist messages, violence and drugs.
Listen people we all have opinions and we have a right to say and feel what we want. If we keep the lines of communication open we can make things better for ourselves and our communities.
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By: Tela on 2/08/2010 7:08AM
SS, love it, love it, love it. Everytime I say I dislike Oprah some Black people cringe. I don't have to like her and she does not speak for me. And, Wendy Williams - please don't get me started. I laughed so hard when you said "people tapping they weave" I was crying. Tell it like it is. Some people hate to hear the truth, but sometimes the truth ain't pretty. ROTFLMAO!
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By: Tela on 2/08/2010 7:20AM
I have one more IBV.
People who get upset when you talk about a celebrity as if they have a personal relationship with them. Give me a break. Those people (celebrities)don't know you and they wouldn't give you a dollar if you was starving in the street. Remember it's the public that makes them rich so stop being so hateful because someone doesn't like a Black celebrity that you like.
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By: Uriah Jordan on 2/08/2010 12:12PM
That's cool, here are some of my confessions.
1) I haven't listened to Hip-Hop in twenty years.
2) I think the only job we can prove existed because of Obama is Michael Steeles's.
3) I watch FOX NEWS.
4) I don't think D.L. Hugley is funny. NOT AT ALL!
5) If I see that big assed Negro dress up as Madea one more time I'll scream!
6) Halle Berry is a soft porn star not an actress.
7) Beyonce and Halle Berry are on the same level when it comes to acting. So Beyonce has one up on Halle 'caus she can sing.
8) Don't watch the NBA or the NWBA so it doesn't matter which one has more skirt chasers.
9) I felt sorry for McCain.
10) I found out that Black kids aren't the only ones poorly educated thanks to Sarah Palin.
11) Because we're so complacent I beleive Sarah Palin will beat Obama in 2012.
12) I don't believe anyone looks for missing black kids but their parents.
13) I believe most single black women secretly want to remain single.
14) 'I can make it on my own' are the seven words that destroyed the black family.
15) I question the sanity of Black folk who give money to racist evengelist like Swaggart and the other one on the 700 Club.
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By: Tina on 1/01/2012 8:32PM
I wouldn't classify you as "bad" because you have your own opinions and tastes. Bad black women are women who:
1) Ruin our image and blame everything on other people but themselves.
2) Unfeminine and unclassy whether in public or private
3) Disgrace black beauty by letting themselves go physically, mentally and emotionally and wear slutty or tacky clothing.
4) Promiscuous. Always giving themselves up for nothing or a little bit, especially to low life males and engaging in risky STD prone behavior. (YUCK)
5) Always seeking credit or approval by boasting themselves up.
6) Having babies out of wedlock. No excuses are accepted. This is a horrendous act as well as choice on bw. They choose to carry the kid to term and raise in fractured, disadvantaged environments when they had the choice of being responsible or lack there of.
7) Always wanting to be pitied or demanding respect. People voluntarily give both but it's very undignified to want pity.
8) Lack of discretion. Many haven't learned how to hide weaknesses tactfully.
9) Bad grooming practices with overuse of artificial things like hair, eyelashes, nails, etc. Looks hookerish.
10) Vulgarity
11) Negative outlook
12) Lack of QUIET strength and apparent serenity in demeanor.
13) Overt self-sexualization. This is totally disgusting.
All these qualities make a bad black woman to me.
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