
When a woman leaves an abusive partner, she often has nowhere to go. If a woman has little resources, then her options are nil as far as a hiding place. Shelters for those seeking refuge from violent domestic situations are available, but far too many are filled to capacity, which means they often have to turn away battered women and their children.
Domestic violence is a leading cause of concern for women, causing more injuries than muggings, stranger rapes and car accidents combined. Statistics have suggested that violence is perpetrated against women in almost half of all marriages. Domestic violence causes almost 100,000 days of hospitalization, 30,000 emergency room visits, and 40,000 trips to the doctor every year. And 50 percent of all homeless women and their children are fleeing domestic violence. In the United States, male partners beat almost 4 million women every year. U.S. Department of Justice statistics indicate that between 1,500 and 2,000 women are murdered annually by current or former partners.
The Violence Policy Center, a national nonprofit that conducts research on violence in the United States, stated in its 2008 annual report that there were 1,818 race-identified females murdered by males. And while white women accounted for the largest number of those killed, 1,208, African American women were killed at a rate nearly three times higher.
Unfortunately, many women who flee from the hands of their abuser to seek shelter or an immediate safe haven in order to gain some measure of control over their lives are being turned away from these places.
More than 44,000 adult victims were turned away from state-funded domestic violence shelters during the last six years because shelters were full. There have been numerous studies that show that safe housing is a major contributor to stabilizing victims of violence.
When victims are abused, they often think that that there is no solution to their predicament, so they stay in the situation. Take the brutal stabbing of lawyer Chiquita Tate about a year ago. The recently married defense attorney was a force to be reckoned with in the courtroom but was helpless at home while her husband, Greg Harris, abused her. The 34-year-old woman was found dead in her office, stabbed 38 times. Tate's husband was arrested and charged with second-degree murder and illegal use of a dangerous weapon. The couple had only been married for 14 months.
The recent death of Karneetha Sanders, 28, who was nine weeks pregnant at the time and allegedly killed by her 56-year-old married boyfriend Edward Aduayi (pictured below), shocked family and friends. Sanders was stabbed, her body dismembered and the remains were stuffed into a barrel that was kept at her boyfriend's beauty supply store in Randolph, Mass.

Although many shelters might not accept a battered woman during her time of need, there are still some alternatives. The Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence (OPDV) advises victims to identify all of the possible people who might be willing and able to help them escape from abusive situations:
- counselor, social worker, therapist
- doctor, dentist, nurse
- friend, family, neighbor
- a spiritual leader or member of your faith community
- employee assistance program (EAP), supervisor, union, co-worker
- staff member at women's centers or senior centers
- teacher, school counselor, parent teacher association member
- department of social services caseworker
Don't wait for an emergency to ask for assistance. Talk with people beforehand and find out what they're willing to do for you. That way, you'll know in advance if you have a place to stay, where to go for help with money or a safe person who can keep copies of important papers for you.
Need help?
Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE.


Comments: (14)
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By: Blessed 38LA on 7/14/2010 4:16AM
I have read all of the comments. Anytime a female or a male starts a relationship with a stranger, notice the first sign of abuse. Like yelling at you for a small reason or no reason. Don't stick around any longer, it will get worse. About battered women not having a place to live, after they leave an abussive relationship, call up a Pastor in your area and he will probably make space for you inside of his church or get you a place. If he is righteous by God, he will help you. My heart goes out to each and every female and male of an abussive relationship, mentally or physically get away from it. God bless all of you.
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By: Will on 7/14/2010 11:27AM
Cinnyminnie, I can tell from your response that you don't believe women are capable of taking care of themselves, choosing good mates to have children with, or supporting themselves, so they must train men to do this or let the wlefare system manage the disaster they create.
You can't change a man's personality. If you are attracted to a thug. Expect the thug to be physically abusive to you, too.
Where you are today is the result of everything you've done before this day. Sometimes, but seldom, people let jealousy drive a conspiracy to make one's life miserable. Such conspiracies go back to my original hypothesis that control is the goal.
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By: John on 7/20/2010 4:21AM
Before believing statistics, ask for the people who provided the information/stats to identify themselves all involved in the research and their: beliefs on violence, gender, race, sexual orientation, and also, what is their view on violence against men by women. Ask for questionaires supplied to them which led them to their conclusions: many times you will discover gender-biasness, like no questions asking men if they have been hit by a woman, or have you ever called the police after being attacked by a wife/gfs? Finally, do the hospitals questionaires on domestic violence or violence in general, include men as victime-do they ask men about violence against them when the wife/gfs is out of the room? Most hospital have nothing to detect violence against men.
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By: Debbie L on 8/19/2011 5:34PM
Why don't ya'll figure out a way to help these women instead critizing them. When they are ready to press charges the courts don't take them seriously. When they are ready to leave him there is no where for them to go! You think these women expected it to get so far as he shoots her? God help none of your daughters end up w an abusive man.
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