Who would have thought that gay and lesbian citizens would flock to the South for any semblance of acceptance?

Certainly not me, but data recently released from the Census Bureau proves me wrong.

According to Gary Gates, a demographer at the University of California, Los Angeles, gay couples below the Mason Dixon Line are more likely to be raising children than their counterparts on the West Coast, in New York and in New England.

Jacksonville, Fla., a city that excoriated gays in the '80s, so much so that a "gay" church was bombed, now has eight churches that openly accepts lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) members, and one of them even caters to their children.

As recently as September 2010, Florida was the only state that completely banned adoption by gay couples.

The study also smashes mainstream stereotypes that all gay people are white, urban and affluent, revealing that the majority of same-sex families living in this region are minorities.


Using data from the American Community survey, Gates determined that black or Latino gay couples are twice as likely as whites to be raising children:

"We're starting to see that the gay community is very diverse," said Bob Witeck, chief executive of Witeck-Combs Communications, which helped market the census to gay people. "We're not all rich white guys."

Experts threw around many theories for the findings, including that with the stigma attached to homosexuality in Southern, multi-cultural communities, many same-sex couples bring children from previous heterosexual relationships to form their current families.

"People grew up in church, so a lot of us lived in shame," said Darlene Maffett, 43, an African American Jacksonville resident who had two children in eight years of marriage before coming out in 2002. "What did we do? We wandered around lost. We married men, and then couldn't understand why every night we had a headache."

While Maffett felt welcomed by the predominately white, gay community in Jacksonville, it was not until she met Valerie Williams that she truly felt she had found a safe haven for her children.

"People were looking to do stuff with their kids, and they had no place to go," she said.

To combat this issue, Williams, pastor of St. Luke's Community Church, founded a program called the Youth Power Hour for children of gay parents. Within a few months, the membership of the predominately African American church more than tripled.

"All of a sudden you started seeing all of these women coming out," Maffett said. "All of them had children."

Around 20 children meet on a consistent basis to discuss their families and the unique challenges they face among their peers. Among them, a 9-year-old girl, who lives with her mothers Cynthia and Monique, expresses her relief to be surrounded by others who understand her situation:

"It feels good to be around people who don't just have moms and dads," she said. "I like it because I'm not alone anymore."

Unfortunately, while she may not be alone, she is more likely to suffer through economic hardships. Though Florida recognizes domestic partnerships, it still does not recognize marriages between gay or lesbian couples as binding, leaving their families lacking financial security.

Since the federal government does not recognize their status, health coverage is considered income and is taxable.

While the ramifications of legalizing same-sex marriage are debated from water coolers to Congress, the vulnerability of the children in these unions is rarely discussed. This year will be the first time that these families are even counted.

"We don't know a lot about this group," Gates said. "Their story has not been told."

In this country, at least the last time I checked, it is illegal to discriminate based on race, religion, sex or creed. Why is same-sex marriage an exception?

It is one thing for personal religious beliefs (or homophobia disguised as religious beliefs) to condemn gay marriage; it's another situation to entirely deny a civil liberty based on those beliefs and endanger children in the process.

Rape, murder and slavery all occur and are accepted at various points throughout the Bible, while in today's society they are considered the height of atrocities. This proves that some people select which biblical teachings to follow based on shifting societal mores, political agendas, and their own harbored prejudices.

I find it highly hypocritical that socially conservative politicians with enough divorces and affairs under their belts to start a harem would dare attempt to define the sanctity of marriage.

When we place our hands over our hearts, and proudly speak these words, "...with liberty, and justice for all," we shouldn't silently add, "Unless you're black," "unless you're a woman," "unless you're gay" ... and "unless you're different."

That is not equality. That is not America.

Jacksonville stands as a model of adaptability and acceptance, characteristics I hope this nation learns to emulate. Though, President Barack Obama continues to "wrestle" with his stance against same-sex marriages, we cannot afford the luxury of denying any citizens basic rights due to something as intensely personal as sexual preference.

The data released by the Census Bureau provides us with a snapshot of the future of this nation, and a picture is worth a thousand words. It reveals that people are either tired of living in secret or finally feel accepted enough to live openly. Whatever the case, progress in the struggle for civil rights for all is within our grasp.